My Phone Is Dead

Well, that's not entirely true. The display on my phone apparently bit the dust. The other day it started making strange choking sounds and then the line went dead, came back and then went dead again. It did this off and on for the next twenty minutes or so. The phone fairy must have waved it's magic wand about then, because I had no further problems.

This morning, I can still receive and make calls, but there's no display on it. Okay, back in the dark ages, none of the phones had caller ID. Thing is, we didn't know any better. We picked up the receiver and said, "Hello" to whomever was on the other end. Now, well it just seems really strange to answer a blind call.

Big Brother is Alive and Well

Every fall we go through the same agony of choosing which insurance coverage we will pay our life savings for. And every year it’s the same line of BS; and every year the BS gets deeper. Bring on the hip waders!

The Company line:
We have spent months negotiating the best price and coverage for you, our employees. You’re lucky to have us on your side. We are here for you and we will go to bat for you. In fact, we’ve already fought long and hard to insure the best possible benefits because we love you.

The lie:
What we’re not telling you is that your rates have doubled; you get less coverage and pay a higher deductible. Our wonderful insurance will pay only for the drugs and procedures that some minimum wage clerk with a high school education is determining from a numbers chart, so get over it. Don’t worry; be happy, we love you.

In the past:
The last couple of years we were privileged (coerced) into participating in a new program that was supposed to let us manage our health by filling out nosy questions online. This program was then supposed to help us correct our health problems. And for doing this, The Company contributed $250 a year toward preventative health care.

Reality-2010
This program is no longer voluntary. If we do not participate, we will be fined $50 a month. There is no $250 incentive for exposing the pitifully naked truth of our lives.

Other Fines
You will be fined if you are overweight. Overweight is to be determined by the insurance provider’s anorexic charts of total delusion. You will be fined if you have high blood pressure. You will be fined if your cholesterol is too high. You will be fined if you smoke. How they will determine if you smoke off company property is not being discussed. In addition, the insurance provider will provide a course of action for us to pursue to improve our numbers. Failure to follow their suggestions will result in another fine.

Conclusions:
Bend over and grab your ankles. Obamacare is here. Brownshirts will be issued to all school children of delusional age. Spy cameras will be used extensively to insure that we the people are kept in line. I believe this program will encourage people to lie.

Instead of treatment, old people will receive death counseling and be given sugar pills. Some will be urged to commit voluntary suicide. (Watch the old movie “Soylent Green.) Next, all infants born with serious (or imagined) physical and/or mental handicaps will be denied treatment.

Will our esteemed politicians be forced to use Obamacare? Will our company execs be forced to submit to the indignity of socialized health care? Hell no! And this is just the beginning.

Another Senior Moment?

Okay, I admit I do stupid things sometimes. Or maybe I should chalk it up to another senior moment, but damn, this is getting scary. Friday when I got home, I noticed that the grass out back and one of my hydrangeas was in need of water.

Being the nurturing gardener I set the Rainbird sprinkler and went back in the house…and then forgot about it. A couple of hours later I realized that the water was still running so ran out and turned it off. As you can imagine, water was puddled everywhere.

After dinner Jimbob went into the bedroom and yells at me, “Can you come in here?” I dropped what I was doing and went to see what he wanted. Wouldn’t you know I’d also forgotten to close the bedroom window?

Of course the carpet was soaked and so were his fifty thousand teddy bears setting on the window seat. I grabbed every available towel and started mopping up. All the wet critters were flung into the bathtub while Jimbob stood watching and trying to figure out what happened.

Thank goodness I hadn’t gotten rid of the small carpet cleaner like I’d planned. It sucked that water up like a magnet. Then I ran a large floor fan aimed at the carpet until we went to bed. By Sunday afternoon we were pretty much dried out.

The teddy bears went outside on the stone retaining wall in the sun. This morning all but three of them are dry and back inside safe and sound until I do something else stupid.

Senior Moment

I had something I was going to write about, but no sooner had I sat down at the computer than my mind went blank. I mean zip, zero, nada, zilch and on and on. Not even a glimmer of what I meant to write. So...I guess I'll just have to chalk it up to a senior moment. Maybe I'll remember later and then I'll have something to post for tomorrow.

Happy First Birthday

My sweet little grandson will celebrate his first birthday this month. As you can see, he is such a happy little boy.

Thankless Tasks

I've decided that taking out the trash and doing laundry are probably the most thankless tasks around the house. When you stop to think about it. you no more than empty all the wastebaskets, take the dumpsters to the curb, and then there's magically more. Same thing with laundry. You empty the laundry hamper and turn around and there's more dirty clothes.

Mouse in the House

I sat down at my desk this morning and was getting everything geared up for the day when I espied, from the corner of my eye, a fuzzy brown streak comeemerge from beneath my desk. A mouse! A sure sign that autumn is on the way.

I tried to follow the little critter’s progress, but it was too fast. And then I spotted it running into the office across from mine. Like a good citizen, I informed the cellmate that a mouse was in his house. I moved the wastebasket and sure enough it darted out and ran under his desk.

If you can imagine, there are lots of nooks and crannies in an office this size, and every year we face the same predicament. I hate killing an innocent, baby mouse, but I don’t want it in my area. You have to know that where you see one, there are probably a dozen more. Get out of my house, mouse.