Say What You Mean

I was cursed growing up with a father, a teacher, who insisted that my sister and I spoke proper English (even if it was just his idea of proper). One of the greatest faux pas we could make (to embarrass him) was to use a double negative. Now that I’m older, I notice these things more than the average bear.

Have you ever thought about what it really means when someone says, “That may not be a bad idea”? If your boss is the one saying it, it could mean anything from “You’re a total idiot and I’m too nice to tell you” or “That’s a great idea and I’m gonna steal it and take credit”.

One of the stupid things that bugs me is the saying “Not bad.” Okay, so if it’s not bad, why not just say good. I guess some people just can’t be positive.

Now, here’s my all time favorite, Mick Jagger and the Rolling Stones singing “I Can’t (image placeholder)Get No Satisfaction.” It’s a double negative, so that must mean he’s getting a whole bunch of whatever it takes to make him happy. You could say “I get no satisfaction” or “I can’t get satisfaction”, but when put together, it means something totally different.

By the way, I saw a picture of Mick Jagger’s father once. If Mick was beat with an ugly stick, they used the whole tree on his father. He makes Mick look like one of the Chippendale dancers.

Have I thoroughly confused this issue? I could come up with some wiseass double negative to end this, but I’m can’t think of anything. If a double negative makes it positive, does a double positive make it negative? Oh Lord, now my brain hurts.