Heartbreak Hotel

I was thinking about Mom on my way home from church this afternoon, so I decided to give her a call. It makes me really sad because after we say hello, there's not a whole lot more to talk about.

I haven't lived near Mom since 1973 and she has pretty much limited her life to taking care of her grandkids in Reno. Now those kids are grown up and my nephew has kids of his own. Unfortunately, he is married to a woman who refuses to allow him or their children to visit my sister or my mother.

Now, she has very little to live for. She's been sitting around waiting to die since she turned 50. Mom will be 88 years old next January.

She also had a major stroke 10 years ago and she does very well with some things, there are others thing she just can't do. Sadly, her speech was affected and her ability to read. Her hearing is getting very bad now, and she accuses my sister of talking softly on purpose so she can't be part of the conversation.

It's so hard for me to call, and I don't do it as often as I should. It breaks my heart to see how much she has deteriorated the last couple of years. I know I should call her more often and I'll be sad when I can't. I guess I just want to deny the truth.